My husband and I tried something new last month. We invited dozens of people—old friends, folks he plays pickleball with, fellow food bank volunteers, members of my book club, etc.—over to our home. The invitation said Saturday and Sunday, 3-7 PM, no RSVP needed, don't bring anything, stay as long or as short as you want. I bought a few bottles of wine, beer and sparkling water, some pizzas, and other simple snacks (fruit, crackers, cheese, etc.). LOTS of folks showed up! It was super fun! It was a little bit of a risk (what if everybody had showed up at once? Our house isn't that big!) but it worked out fine, and we got to catch up with a lot of friends old & new in a low-pressure, fun manner.
This is so timely, Garrett. Thank you. I'm hosting my third, Build-Your-Own Community Dinner tonight (burrito bowls this time!). I had to postpone from last Friday because last week was just too much. Also, I thought changing to a different weeknight might increase rsvps, but it didn't. And so, I might only have a couple of folks at my table tonight. And a whole ton of leftovers.
Part of me wants to crawl under a rock. But instead, I'll set out food, talk to whoever shows up, and do it again next month, trusting that it will build over time. And if it remains small, sometimes very small, that's okay, too. It's not nothing, and that's the only way they win. If we actually do nothing.
Holy crap Asha you're doing it. You're not actively crawling under a rock, though boy do I get it. I'd love to hear how it goes, wherever on the spectrum you land between "actually, better than expected" and "oh my god that was awful and now look at all these leftovers."
On a separate note, I was pining for Columbia City as I was reading your essay. I don’t know if it’s still there, but there used to be an affordable and DELICIOUS Ethiopian place right off the main drag back in the day. If you have a chance while you’re in town and it’s still there, check it out.
I am generally of the opinion that any cuisine that involves family style service and you get to eat with your hands is the best for community building. If I had any talent with Ethiopian food, that would be my next BYO dinner for sure.
A core potluck memory I don’t share about enough was the class potlucks we used to have when I was a refugee English teacher in Chicago. We had folks in the class from a dozen countries, but a critical mass from Ethiopia and Eritrea and when I tell you about the absolute PILES of injera.
Community Dinner #3 was good! Still small, but the perfect size to fit around my table. Of the five people that showed up, two were ride-alongs who I've no history with, and all five had never come before. Conversation was lively, there was lots of laughter, and, if I do say so myself, the food was delicious. A friend also brought homemade rose ice cream, which I never would try left to my own devices, but was also delish.
It's also worth noting, if only to myself, that only one person who came had said they were coming. Everyone else just appeared. So, you just never know until the very moment. Might as well try.
Agreed. Massive, but in a quiet, sustainable way, rather than a blow the roof off the house way. It’s worth remembering that success can look and feel that way, too.
Excited to be hosting, Garrett! And as the person who sat on that bench, I'm happy to connect with anyone who is doing something like this. It's really rewarding to know your neighbors. Inviting is a true act of generosity, a gift that tends comes back (although not always in the ways we predict).
Thanks for being so welcoming, Nicole! As a recipient of your willingness to sit on the bench(I presume that means bring it up to your neighbors and apply for a Washington spot in the Relay) I am so grateful! I look forward to meeting you, and your neighbors and Garrett and whoever shows up tonight!
Nod for my fellow introverts here: I am particularly grateful for friends who know that my "no" is no reflection on them, just of my own disturbingly low capacity for socializing (especially in groups), and that they keep inviting me, even if I can only manage a "yes" every tenth time.
Literally mixing up a batch of snack mix with the same iconic flavors as we speak. Can't stop won't stop with the salty sweet! Maybe the mix is also your personality 😄
Thanks for this Garrett! I've been trying to get a monthly potluck going for a little while but sometimes my energy isn't there and more often than a few times I couldn't get anyone to show up. I'll keep trying though.
Read this while cleaning up from a potluck I had to keep a burn pile I needed to burn from being a boring afternoon. Marshmallow on the wall: it was a good party.
I just learned my county health department is offering $500 grants to host accessible block parties to meet your neighbors - you inspired me to text my neighbor to ask if we should apply and she said yes!
My husband and I tried something new last month. We invited dozens of people—old friends, folks he plays pickleball with, fellow food bank volunteers, members of my book club, etc.—over to our home. The invitation said Saturday and Sunday, 3-7 PM, no RSVP needed, don't bring anything, stay as long or as short as you want. I bought a few bottles of wine, beer and sparkling water, some pizzas, and other simple snacks (fruit, crackers, cheese, etc.). LOTS of folks showed up! It was super fun! It was a little bit of a risk (what if everybody had showed up at once? Our house isn't that big!) but it worked out fine, and we got to catch up with a lot of friends old & new in a low-pressure, fun manner.
Sue this makes me SO HAPPY!
This is so timely, Garrett. Thank you. I'm hosting my third, Build-Your-Own Community Dinner tonight (burrito bowls this time!). I had to postpone from last Friday because last week was just too much. Also, I thought changing to a different weeknight might increase rsvps, but it didn't. And so, I might only have a couple of folks at my table tonight. And a whole ton of leftovers.
Part of me wants to crawl under a rock. But instead, I'll set out food, talk to whoever shows up, and do it again next month, trusting that it will build over time. And if it remains small, sometimes very small, that's okay, too. It's not nothing, and that's the only way they win. If we actually do nothing.
Holy crap Asha you're doing it. You're not actively crawling under a rock, though boy do I get it. I'd love to hear how it goes, wherever on the spectrum you land between "actually, better than expected" and "oh my god that was awful and now look at all these leftovers."
On a separate note, I was pining for Columbia City as I was reading your essay. I don’t know if it’s still there, but there used to be an affordable and DELICIOUS Ethiopian place right off the main drag back in the day. If you have a chance while you’re in town and it’s still there, check it out.
I am generally of the opinion that any cuisine that involves family style service and you get to eat with your hands is the best for community building. If I had any talent with Ethiopian food, that would be my next BYO dinner for sure.
A core potluck memory I don’t share about enough was the class potlucks we used to have when I was a refugee English teacher in Chicago. We had folks in the class from a dozen countries, but a critical mass from Ethiopia and Eritrea and when I tell you about the absolute PILES of injera.
!! OK OK - was it Alem? Cafe Ibex? Delish? Habesha Cafe (was Amy's Merkado)? All of those meet the description. It's an amazing neighborhood!
I’ll confess, it was 25 years, two kids, and an entire menopause ago. That detail memory level is GONE. 😅
Next time you're around you'll just have to sample all of them and see what memory dredges up :)
I have a report!
Community Dinner #3 was good! Still small, but the perfect size to fit around my table. Of the five people that showed up, two were ride-alongs who I've no history with, and all five had never come before. Conversation was lively, there was lots of laughter, and, if I do say so myself, the food was delicious. A friend also brought homemade rose ice cream, which I never would try left to my own devices, but was also delish.
It's also worth noting, if only to myself, that only one person who came had said they were coming. Everyone else just appeared. So, you just never know until the very moment. Might as well try.
ASHA!!! This sounds like a massive success!
Agreed. Massive, but in a quiet, sustainable way, rather than a blow the roof off the house way. It’s worth remembering that success can look and feel that way, too.
Excited to be hosting, Garrett! And as the person who sat on that bench, I'm happy to connect with anyone who is doing something like this. It's really rewarding to know your neighbors. Inviting is a true act of generosity, a gift that tends comes back (although not always in the ways we predict).
Thanks for being so welcoming, Nicole! As a recipient of your willingness to sit on the bench(I presume that means bring it up to your neighbors and apply for a Washington spot in the Relay) I am so grateful! I look forward to meeting you, and your neighbors and Garrett and whoever shows up tonight!
Sue
You're an inspiration always, Garrett!
Nod for my fellow introverts here: I am particularly grateful for friends who know that my "no" is no reflection on them, just of my own disturbingly low capacity for socializing (especially in groups), and that they keep inviting me, even if I can only manage a "yes" every tenth time.
That tenth time yes, though!
Garrett + Garrett's Popcorn is always a winning combo. Good luck and have fun!! ❤️
Would you like to know if it gets old having the best popcorn in America have your name on it? It does not get old.
Literally mixing up a batch of snack mix with the same iconic flavors as we speak. Can't stop won't stop with the salty sweet! Maybe the mix is also your personality 😄
I am now going to spend the rest of the day considering this. What's all in the snack mix though?
I cannot figure out how to insert a photo, but picture it, Sicily, 1922...
It's just corn Chex, Cheez-its, other bits and bobs and a whole lotta maple syrup and brown sugar
lol
Garrett I am on your agenda at the coffee shop today at noon.
A. May I bring a friend or two?
B. I am hoping to buy you lunch. OK?✅
Please bring friends! And that's very kind- I'll see how hungry I am when noon comes around :)
OK!
Thanks for this Garrett! I've been trying to get a monthly potluck going for a little while but sometimes my energy isn't there and more often than a few times I couldn't get anyone to show up. I'll keep trying though.
Read this while cleaning up from a potluck I had to keep a burn pile I needed to burn from being a boring afternoon. Marshmallow on the wall: it was a good party.
I just learned my county health department is offering $500 grants to host accessible block parties to meet your neighbors - you inspired me to text my neighbor to ask if we should apply and she said yes!