I really loved this essay. I've slept in every state in the US, lived for years in the South(AL & TX) and Northeast (PA, NY, NJ, DC), also spent months in CA, FL,,MASS, CO, and weeks in many more. I was always able to find "my people" in every setting. And to learn a lot from folks who didn't fit that profile. Diversity thrills me!! At 83, I remain amazed and delighted by the capacity to find connection.
Home is where the heart(h) is? A neighbor whose politics are diametrically opposite mine started a rant as she walked by. When it was clear that civil discourse wasn't in her vocabulary, I turned away. She soon realized that my husband had very recently died and she showed up with a home-made banana bread. While the friendship wanes and waxes, our determination to keep the neighborhood connected and its people visible holds firm. If either of us forgets and reacts to something political, the other gently reminds of our agreement that connection is much more important and lasting than whatever horrors are uppermost in our biased minds.
Is this God's country? As I watch the cars pour out of driveways on the way to church, reminding myself that I often attend services on Friday nite or Saturday morning, but "Never on a Sunday" and consider the many versions of God that obtain in these environs, I'd have to say: Probably, but not Uniquely.
Garrett, I think about this so much, as someone who lives in a blue dot in a red state, and chose to leave one of the greatest cities on earth (NY) for flyover country. My whole adult life I've been having conversations with people so quick to generalize what people in some "other" place are like (even when that other place is the same county). I actually ranted about this on IG this week (particularly calling out progressive people in my town for writing off the rest of the state and thinking they're special when really we've been horribly gerrymandered) and one of my friends wrote me, "Dang. You're so right. I do this all the time and I should do better." I'll take small victories.
First off I'm just so impressed that you had a successful Instagram rank! And yes to all of this- we're so addicted to stories about other places and what they supposedly say about us.
Speaking of being back home, guess where I am! SWEDEN!!! I'm about to participate in a couple of very Swedish rituals: 1) making sure I get over to Systembolaget before it closes tonight to pick up some wine for the weekend, and 2) collecting fabric and e-waste for the pop-up recycling center that'll be in the neighborhood tomorrow (fun fact: it's illegal to throw away old clothes, towels, sheets etc. in Sweden).
As my 5yo and I listened to “What it Sounds Like” this morning I listened specifically thinkingto about collectivism, vulnerability, etc. Before I had only been bopping out w/ my kiddos not thinking about it, but this morning I got chills 😂
My son only really likes Soda Pop but we have had some incredibly enriching discussions about shame, regret, motivations, mass consumption, etc. We will have to practice the other songs in preparation for a theater singalong on Sunday!
We've had an out-of-town guest for the last week. He was an exchange student from Switzerland and we were hs seniors together 50 years ago beginning next week.
Anyway, as is common when people visit, we've been doing all the things. Biked down Snowbowl and the Hiawatha (on different days!), took the kiddo to Lake Como, floated the Clark Fork ,hiked the Blodgett Overlook, trivia at Meagher, just got back from the Mudflaps at the Rootsfest. While we don't usually do all that stuff in a single week, this is kind of how our summer looks, along with both Lakes McDonald (everyone forgets about the other one), biking the 'snake, and other stuff. It's a pretty good place to live.
State politics are bad, to be sure. Our local scene is interesting, and a couple of city council races present interesting choices: how left do folks want to go, really, and what's the right trade-off between advocacy and efficacy.
Who feeds these people, indeed. I fear that is going to become an ever more important question. Thanks for being a writer who exerts enough care over your pieces that I literally do not skip over any paragraphs, or even sentences or words. That is a rare pleasure on this platform. 🤗♥️
I loved this, thank you! I still struggle to convince my PNW family/friends that the red state where I've ended up making my home is worth their time to visit. Shockingly, everyone that comes loves it??? (But still makes all the horrible "red state" comments you mention here and it makes me want to scream.)
I think it's easy to look at, say, an electoral map and make assumptions about the kind of people that might live in a place or what they value. But as I like to remind people, my specific dot on that map went for Bernie in 2016 so, the swatch of red really fractures the more you zoom in! It's really reframed how I think about things - oh boy does a school board election matter here, even if my vote for state/federal elections is a drop in the bucket! (And this is just me talking about politics, since that's the main source of dismissal by some members of my family. The community I have here is the most wonderful I've ever experienced! And it's so beautiful! I could go on, haha - I'm so fortunate to have ended up here via the wild academic job market.)
Loved this one, Garrett, and the fact that your childhood librarian gave it a thumbs-up only brings home how insightful and thoughtful it is. I do think place matters at a level that's hard to define, but not in the way most people think of it. Away from Montana, I always felt homesick, but that doesn't mean it's any better (or worse!) than anywhere else. 🏔️💖
Every time I'm back home, I'm obsessively tracking "so what is it about here that makes it home?" and I feel like I'm surprised every time with what comes to the forefront (not always the same answer!)
This really resonates as someone born and raised in Cleveland who spent summers in the Fatherland of southern Wisconsin (Brodhead) and ties to Chicago (Lake Forest) as we drove through each year. Having moved to Montana 31 years ago sight unseen (Potomac-Missoula-Stevensville) and watched those decades alter a place that was never mine but is now where my sons call their home. I hope you had restorative time under the Big Sky. I know I'll be thinking of it while spending Christmas in Cleveland😉
I really loved this essay. I've slept in every state in the US, lived for years in the South(AL & TX) and Northeast (PA, NY, NJ, DC), also spent months in CA, FL,,MASS, CO, and weeks in many more. I was always able to find "my people" in every setting. And to learn a lot from folks who didn't fit that profile. Diversity thrills me!! At 83, I remain amazed and delighted by the capacity to find connection.
This made me smile so much, Lou.
Home is where the heart(h) is? A neighbor whose politics are diametrically opposite mine started a rant as she walked by. When it was clear that civil discourse wasn't in her vocabulary, I turned away. She soon realized that my husband had very recently died and she showed up with a home-made banana bread. While the friendship wanes and waxes, our determination to keep the neighborhood connected and its people visible holds firm. If either of us forgets and reacts to something political, the other gently reminds of our agreement that connection is much more important and lasting than whatever horrors are uppermost in our biased minds.
Is this God's country? As I watch the cars pour out of driveways on the way to church, reminding myself that I often attend services on Friday nite or Saturday morning, but "Never on a Sunday" and consider the many versions of God that obtain in these environs, I'd have to say: Probably, but not Uniquely.
Thank you for being a banana bread neighbor, even when it's hard. I absolutely love your last line here.
Garrett, I think about this so much, as someone who lives in a blue dot in a red state, and chose to leave one of the greatest cities on earth (NY) for flyover country. My whole adult life I've been having conversations with people so quick to generalize what people in some "other" place are like (even when that other place is the same county). I actually ranted about this on IG this week (particularly calling out progressive people in my town for writing off the rest of the state and thinking they're special when really we've been horribly gerrymandered) and one of my friends wrote me, "Dang. You're so right. I do this all the time and I should do better." I'll take small victories.
First off I'm just so impressed that you had a successful Instagram rank! And yes to all of this- we're so addicted to stories about other places and what they supposedly say about us.
Speaking of being back home, guess where I am! SWEDEN!!! I'm about to participate in a couple of very Swedish rituals: 1) making sure I get over to Systembolaget before it closes tonight to pick up some wine for the weekend, and 2) collecting fabric and e-waste for the pop-up recycling center that'll be in the neighborhood tomorrow (fun fact: it's illegal to throw away old clothes, towels, sheets etc. in Sweden).
Sue, you made it back!!! I can't tell you how happy this makes me!! Stora kramar to all your people there!!
What about "Golden" and "What it Sounds Like" though? Sounds about collectivism and self-acceptance!
As my 5yo and I listened to “What it Sounds Like” this morning I listened specifically thinkingto about collectivism, vulnerability, etc. Before I had only been bopping out w/ my kiddos not thinking about it, but this morning I got chills 😂
I am not ashamed to admit that "What it sounds like" has been a grower for me-- I was originally a hater.
Noooo, Garrett, noo! All my illusions have been crushed.
That was my response to it! Really came through when we saw it in the theaters over the weekend.
My son only really likes Soda Pop but we have had some incredibly enriching discussions about shame, regret, motivations, mass consumption, etc. We will have to practice the other songs in preparation for a theater singalong on Sunday!
We've had an out-of-town guest for the last week. He was an exchange student from Switzerland and we were hs seniors together 50 years ago beginning next week.
Anyway, as is common when people visit, we've been doing all the things. Biked down Snowbowl and the Hiawatha (on different days!), took the kiddo to Lake Como, floated the Clark Fork ,hiked the Blodgett Overlook, trivia at Meagher, just got back from the Mudflaps at the Rootsfest. While we don't usually do all that stuff in a single week, this is kind of how our summer looks, along with both Lakes McDonald (everyone forgets about the other one), biking the 'snake, and other stuff. It's a pretty good place to live.
State politics are bad, to be sure. Our local scene is interesting, and a couple of city council races present interesting choices: how left do folks want to go, really, and what's the right trade-off between advocacy and efficacy.
Man you all are some amazing hosts. And yes, the city council races do look really fascinating this time around, a couple in particular.
Who feeds these people, indeed. I fear that is going to become an ever more important question. Thanks for being a writer who exerts enough care over your pieces that I literally do not skip over any paragraphs, or even sentences or words. That is a rare pleasure on this platform. 🤗♥️
oh wow that's so kind-- and great point (unfortunately) about the increased urgency of the "who feeds these people?" question.
I loved this, thank you! I still struggle to convince my PNW family/friends that the red state where I've ended up making my home is worth their time to visit. Shockingly, everyone that comes loves it??? (But still makes all the horrible "red state" comments you mention here and it makes me want to scream.)
What do you think is behind those comments? I'm so fascinated by the ways that we pass judgment between us.
I think it's easy to look at, say, an electoral map and make assumptions about the kind of people that might live in a place or what they value. But as I like to remind people, my specific dot on that map went for Bernie in 2016 so, the swatch of red really fractures the more you zoom in! It's really reframed how I think about things - oh boy does a school board election matter here, even if my vote for state/federal elections is a drop in the bucket! (And this is just me talking about politics, since that's the main source of dismissal by some members of my family. The community I have here is the most wonderful I've ever experienced! And it's so beautiful! I could go on, haha - I'm so fortunate to have ended up here via the wild academic job market.)
Loved this one, Garrett, and the fact that your childhood librarian gave it a thumbs-up only brings home how insightful and thoughtful it is. I do think place matters at a level that's hard to define, but not in the way most people think of it. Away from Montana, I always felt homesick, but that doesn't mean it's any better (or worse!) than anywhere else. 🏔️💖
Every time I'm back home, I'm obsessively tracking "so what is it about here that makes it home?" and I feel like I'm surprised every time with what comes to the forefront (not always the same answer!)
Do you know of any Blessingers in Montana? My ancestors stayed in WAUKESHA Wisconsin, but one of them went to Bozeman, Montana. Always on the lookout!
I don't but I will keep looking out for you!
This really resonates as someone born and raised in Cleveland who spent summers in the Fatherland of southern Wisconsin (Brodhead) and ties to Chicago (Lake Forest) as we drove through each year. Having moved to Montana 31 years ago sight unseen (Potomac-Missoula-Stevensville) and watched those decades alter a place that was never mine but is now where my sons call their home. I hope you had restorative time under the Big Sky. I know I'll be thinking of it while spending Christmas in Cleveland😉
Love all the webs of connection here (Cleveland is a pretty special place to me as well, though I've never lived there).